Again?!


WARNING: Dreadful Relationship Blog

Sometimes I wonder why I’m in a relationship with such a jerk. Yes he can be a great time, sweet, and promising at times. There’s only one major flaw that keeps me from moving on and I just simply cannot go forward if I know it’ll always exist. My boyfriend has a tendency of chatting with other girls and in the process he receives pictures of them. Granted this is all online, from what I know… so there is no chance of them actually meeting up and continuing things. However its still pretty damn exhausting and so annoying. Yesterday he left the house to go buy pet supplies for a puppy I gave him… so as he was out I was in his room and just to let you know.. We made a promise in where I would trust him and stop checking in on him.. which I have. His end of the promise was to stop chatting with other girls and stop doing things he wouldn’t do in front of me. Well its not a surprise that I broke the promise, I was curious to know if he was being faithful.

Surprise, surprise. I went into pictures, saw a folder named “XXX” and silly me.. I thought “Oh he has my pictures the PC?” Well that was not me in the pictures alright. And it wasn’t just one girl either. It was a bunch. I’m talking about ehh ten pictures in total of different girls. I wasn’t upset. I wasn’t even mad. Doesn’t that say something about the situation? When you just don’t even care anymore? I know these were pictures sent to him. He possibly asked for them from some random girl online. And of course I know girls aren’t stupid enough to send pictures of themselves to strangers. Actually I take that back because that’s a lie. But anyways my guess is that its mostly girls sending him FAKE pictures. So in a way I guess that’s why it doesn’t bother me. They did look like normal girls.

Well typical me would confront him. This would lead onto another dreading argument in where not one of us would come into an agreement. This time I just let it go. It doesn’t mean I won’t take it seriously.. I just didn’t want to ruin a great day because of him. Why should I stress myself over him? I’m just sick of it. I’m tired of feeling this way! I honestly do not know what to do. I know the guy would never cheat on me in real life but its just so annoying he needs to seek other girls online to get off. Where am I in this?  Obviously something is wrong with this picture. And here I go again stressing over it haha. What would you do if you were in my shoes?

I could dump him. See.. I’ve been waiting for him to change and I know it’s most likely not going to happen but who knows? I feel as though he still has a lot of growing up to do and I know I do too. In alot of ways I try to sit back and look at the problem from the outside and I realize I’m being stupid by putting up with it. I know I should walk away, learn from the relationship and start anew. I know most likely he will learn his mistake if not with me, somewhere down the road and then he will know. I’m so lost with my thoughts I forget what is the next logical thing to do. Hah. I have much more to ramble of but I prefer to take care of my puppy! 😛 And the truth is it just got about 20 degrees hotter here, so I have to get moving!

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2 thoughts on “Again?!

  1. If I were in your shoes, I would have left the asshole a while ago; but that’s just me. It seems to me like you cannot trust the guy and if you can’t trust him and you have PROOF that he is looking at other girls, I don’t know what you are waiting for. Dump the guy, you seem like a funny person that any guy would like. But that is my opinion and if you feel in your heart that you two are meant to be, than go for it. I do not have the best of experience with boys, I do not possess a little thing called patience. I think you should talk to him and if he doesn’t change there are MILLIONS of guys out there. Except I know how much it hurts to lose someone you care about. Best of luck.
    L.C.

    • Thank you for the insight. I really appreciate the reply and I can’t help but to agree with you. I do realize there are better guys out there and you are right about me not being able to trust him. I’ve been trying but it’s just difficult to build up trust if there hasn’t been any improvement. Its almost like If I want to be with him, I can but at the same time I choose to shut out everything he’s done or can be doing. Pretty much just blind myself. Haha but that’s not the way its supposed to be! Now its just a matter of time because I don’t think he’s catching on.

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